LESSONS IN LOVE + A CAREGIVERS GIVEAWAY (WINNERS ANNOUNCED!)
INTRODUCING CINDI ZIMMERMAN
Today’s TRIBE Tuesday features the touching and heartfelt story of Cindy Zimmerman who took my most recent Bloom True E-Course in January. Her journey is one of strength, trust and courage, both on the canvas and off.
Thank you, Cindy, for sharing your story with us here today…
Before I took Flora’s course, I had been painting for a year, mostly happy, bright, whimsical paintings….
But despite the happy vibes, when I painted I usually reached a point on each canvas where I became very fussy, anxious and frustrated. I can honestly say I had NONE of that angst on my Bloom True canvases.
Instead I had sheer excitement and joy with every mark I made (the good, the bad and the ugly, LOL). Ironically, the end result is not exactly a “happy” painting, but that was where intuition and my personal inspiration for imagery really came in.
At first I tried to ignore “that voice inside” and pushed it aside a few times, but cancer has been prevalent in my world more than I care to discuss….so I guess painting it was a way for me to verbalize it without uttering a word.
During week 3, as I pondered images that inspire me. I thought of all the brave people I’ve known and couldn’t think of anything more beautiful. I committed to that imagery (for that moment), and no sooner than I laid the scarved lady onto layer #6, my OBGYN called to say he found “questionable cells” during my annual exam and needed to do a biopsy of my uterus.
As you can imagine, week 4 (Being Brave) took on extremely personal meaning as I faced the biopsy and awaited results.
I tried to abandon the image I had previously committed to (fearing it was a bad omen), started to paint her away, but instead listened to that little voice and moved to my other canvas. But she wouldn’t leave me alone.So I went to work on the background, painting everything around her but rarely touching her face. The random mark making was the perfect distraction while waiting for results.
I made a bold change, letting go of the flowers that previously danced in the background. Who would’ve thought that stamping and decorating little hexagon shapes could be so joyful, but doing so truly got me through several days of worry.
Periodically I’d ask myself if the main image needed to be replaced entirely as well, but when I finally heard the word BENIGN from my doctor (whew!), I knew my scarved beauty belonged on that canvas and deserved to be finished.
Cancer is an uncomfortable subject, and I’m sure many people would prefer not to see it in art (remember, even I had previously created “happy” paintings, in large part to escape from everything less than happy in my 3-D world).
In no way did I intend to make a political statement with this. It’s just very real and impactful to me, and my gut kept telling me to paint this woman (I don’t know who she is), at this specific point in her journey. The word “strength” came and went several times, so I knew I was being tested.
My mother suggested I give her more of a smile….but no. She is too tired to smile. Cancer and chemo and radiation have a way of doing that to a person. That’s reality. But still, she puts on her lipstick and adorns her hairless, aching head with a colorful scarf, determined to get through the hard days. I don’t know how this woman’s story ends, but she is valiant by every measure no matter the outcome.
I’ve loved many women (and men) with the same circumstances and sadly have lost a few, but I’m so grateful that they allowed me to be part of their journey. I learned so much through their experiences, they inspired me in ways I can’t describe, and this painting honors all of them.
I was drawn to Bloom True because 1) the way Flora painted looked FUN and 2) I admired her end results and hoped that I would learn how to turn out similar paintings.
I never could have imagined the painting that would be the product of the E-Course. I also didn’t bargain for the life lessons I learned here: The power of listening to our intuition, making bold commitments while staying open to change, tuning in to our own inspiring life, and the importance of gratitude.
I’m excited now to go to my other canvas now. I have no idea or expectations of what it will become, but I sense this topic isn’t finished with me yet. So I will play and have fun and see where the marks take me…while being mindful of that little voice that keeps whispering.
Thank you Flora for guiding me to listen, and for sharing your amazing approach. My paintings and my life will forever be richer for it.
Related posts
You'll also receive tips, tricks, and creative cheerleading in your inbox to keep your creativity flowing...
Wow, your story and strength are just beautiful. You are strong and bold, and I am in awe. Congratulations. http://www.carolynmackin.me
Wow, your story and strength are just beautiful. You are strong and bold, and I am in awe. Congratulations. http://www.carolynmackin.me
awesome story and awesome art! Thank you for sharing.
awesome story and awesome art! Thank you for sharing.
Hi Cindi,
I am deeply moved by your story, your painting and your process.
Thank you for sharing it.
Yvette
Hi Cindi,
I am deeply moved by your story, your painting and your process.
Thank you for sharing it.
Yvette
Powerful feelings, strength! Your scarf woman has such depth in her expression. I am glad you let her speak. Thank you for sharing this.
Powerful feelings, strength! Your scarf woman has such depth in her expression. I am glad you let her speak. Thank you for sharing this.
Thank you all for the kind comments, to all the brave bloomers who shared themselves throughout the course, and to Flora for providing such an awakening experience. Such a gift!
Thank you all for the kind comments, to all the brave bloomers who shared themselves throughout the course, and to Flora for providing such an awakening experience. Such a gift!
So interesting to see your story unfold Sis, so grateful you can put a face on it thru the canvas and brush. A+
So interesting to see your story unfold Sis, so grateful you can put a face on it thru the canvas and brush. A+
Another fabulous piece of art from you, sis! Both your painted and written story speak to me on a very personal level. I truly admire your ability to embrace your vulnerability and open yourself up to new things.
Another fabulous piece of art from you, sis! Both your painted and written story speak to me on a very personal level. I truly admire your ability to embrace your vulnerability and open yourself up to new things.
What you have taught my daughter will take her to so many places I can only imagine. She is unbelievable , Both inside and out. I love her story and followed all the way ( how excited she was as she followed each class, and Learned each new lesson. Love you Cindi to the moon and back. Keep on painting your stories.
What you have taught my daughter will take her to so many places I can only imagine. She is unbelievable , Both inside and out. I love her story and followed all the way ( how excited she was as she followed each class, and Learned each new lesson. Love you Cindi to the moon and back. Keep on painting your stories.
I am so happy for you that your results were benign. Your story and photo moved me, Cindi. I am an ovarian cancer survivor (6 years this summer) you are accurate in describing the ups and downs of the cancer journey. Your beautiful portrait brought a smile to my face because like your nameless survivor, I too would put a scarf on my head and lipstick on my lips and face each day with courage and hope. An absolutely lovely and deeply affecting post. Thank you.
I am so happy for you that your results were benign. Your story and photo moved me, Cindi. I am an ovarian cancer survivor (6 years this summer) you are accurate in describing the ups and downs of the cancer journey. Your beautiful portrait brought a smile to my face because like your nameless survivor, I too would put a scarf on my head and lipstick on my lips and face each day with courage and hope. An absolutely lovely and deeply affecting post. Thank you.
As your neighbor and truly “old friend” of going-on 9 years, I feel I have walked many steps of your journey with you. As one of our other neighbors describes you, Cindi: “You are one classy lady.” So happy you are right next door.
Claudine
As your neighbor and truly “old friend” of going-on 9 years, I feel I have walked many steps of your journey with you. As one of our other neighbors describes you, Cindi: “You are one classy lady.” So happy you are right next door.
Claudine
Cindi, I am at a loss for words to describe your talent. And to think you just started painting such a short time ago. Your paintings show the talent and stories which have been stored within your soul and they are basking in the glory of bringing it to light. You definitely got the artistic gene from your famous Uncle.
More, more, more, please.
xoxo
Cindi, I am at a loss for words to describe your talent. And to think you just started painting such a short time ago. Your paintings show the talent and stories which have been stored within your soul and they are basking in the glory of bringing it to light. You definitely got the artistic gene from your famous Uncle.
More, more, more, please.
xoxo
Cindi, you’ve grown into such a beautiful woman. Art is an emotional journey & the process of transmitting that to the medium. Your story touched me. Keep up the wonderful work. Luv.
Cindi, you’ve grown into such a beautiful woman. Art is an emotional journey & the process of transmitting that to the medium. Your story touched me. Keep up the wonderful work. Luv.
Cindi, I enjoyed reading your article. I love your paintings and I’m so glad that you have found a medium through which you can express yourself and share with others. Keep on painting! Love you, Sandy
Cindi, I enjoyed reading your article. I love your paintings and I’m so glad that you have found a medium through which you can express yourself and share with others. Keep on painting! Love you, Sandy
What a wonderful story and a testament to listening to your gut. Your painting is so powerful. Every little detail is strong and thank you for not making her smile. It’s honest.
What a wonderful story and a testament to listening to your gut. Your painting is so powerful. Every little detail is strong and thank you for not making her smile. It’s honest.
Your painting inspires me! I have venturedinto braver painting on my own and loved the results. I hung my painting in my classroom where I do therapy with abused and unpriveldged high schoolers; it really speaks to them! I want to bring painting to them next school year and am working on obtaining supplies to do so! Thank you for your bright light of inspiration reaching way out into our wild and remote community!
I honor you!